Steven Orinick 1954-2018

Steve Orinick 1974

Today I learned that my cousin Steve Orinick passed away last week.  Although we had not been in communication for many years, due to differences in lifestyles developed over the years, I have fond memories of our childhood.  Steve and his brother Ted were more like brothers than cousins to me growing up.  My own brothers were much older than me, but I was in the middle of a 3 year range between these 2 cousins.  When we were about 3, 4, and 5, and their parents were having some difficulty, Ted and Steve spent an entire summer living with my family in N.J. and I think that's when we really bonded.  Steve called my father his "Jersey Daddy" from that time on.

Before and after that, almost every weekend my parents would drive from our house In N.J. to the farm where my mother grew up in Pennsylvania.  My cousins lived there, and we spent Saturdays and Sundays helping care for the dairy cows, working in the fields when we were needed, and then roaming the 100 acres of wood and fields.  Some days we wandered far down the country roads, while other times we played in the hay bales in the second floor of the barn.  Over the years we had adventures too numerous to chronicle here.   My uncle had a barrel of apple cider in the basement, and sometimes we would fill some mason jars to take with us.  (As it fermented, it got even better. 😉)  On Saturday nights, when most of the adults gathered for adult entertainment, our 2 single aunts took the 3 of us to dinner or other activities that further enhanced my childhood memories. 

As we transitioned to adulthood and married life our paths diverged greatly.  Despite differences in life choices that made it impossible for us to be friends as adults, I never stopped loving my cousin-brothers, and the fact that we could no longer be friends still makes me sad.  I suspect the last few years of Steve’s life were not the best and I pray that he is finally at peace. 

Lillian Orinick 1928-2011

School Days

When I began this blog, I made a decision not to write about any living people.  As a result, I left out one member of my mother’s family, her sister Lillian.  Aunt Lil passed away last Friday, so I can now talk about my favorite aunt.  She was the last of the 7 sisters and 3 brothers.  This is going to be a long post, but I will not apologize for that. There is no way I can say enough.

Lillian was born on April 27, 1928, the youngest child of Mathew and Anna Orinick.  Her baptismal name was Lydia, but everyone called her Lilly.  Lilly’s father died when she was 7. Her mother was not well during Lilly’s early years so her oldest sister, Mary, raised her from the time she came into this world. Their mother died when Lil was about 11, so she never really knew either of her parents.   Mary was the only mother Lil knew and Lil was devoted to her.

I don’t know much about her life as a young woman.  I was told that she contracted tuberculosis in her early 20’s and recovered for a time in my parents’ home.  By the time I was old enough to know her, Lilly and her sister Helen had rented an apartment together in Kearny, New Jersey.  Neither sister ever married, and they lived together from that point on until the last few years of their lives.   I can’t suppress a smile thinking of how they sometimes acted like an old married couple.  They had different personalities and often fought, but they also loved and took care of each other.  When I wrote about Helen in a previous post, it was very difficult not to mention Lilly.  As long as I can remember, it was rarely Helen or Lilly - for almost everything it was Helen AND Lilly.

Lil's professional side

Lil worked as a radiology technician, but her passion was art.  In her spare time she loved to paint. When I was in high school she took me to my first art exhibit.  I don’t know what happened to all her paintings, but I have one work of art that she did for me as a birthday present.  It is the face of a clown crafted out of seashells that I collected on the beach at Seaside Heights, New Jersey.  She told me that she used every shell I gave her, fitting it into the face like pieces of a puzzle made to come together.  She never signed her work though.  Once, I asked her to sign my clown and she refused, saying that if she ever became famous for her art, signatures would cause trouble that she didn’t wish on me.   I never understood that, but I respected her wish and never asked again.

She also loved to return to the farm where she grew up.  As I’ve mentioned in prior posts, her sister Mary lived on the family farm all her life.  Helen and Lil would drive to Pennsylvania every weekend to visit and help on the farm.  They worked in the vegetable gardens with Mary and in the fields with their brother Ted and his wife Shirley.  On weekends when my family made the trip as well, we worked with them and went out in the evening to one of the local taverns.

 Lil was everybody’s favorite aunt. The main reason for this was that she didn’t just go off with the adults – she always had time for the kids.  She taught many of us to drive in the empty fields after the crops were harvested.  In taverns, she often sat at a table with the kids or played pool with us instead of sitting at the bar with the other adults.  Sometimes she and Helen would take us out for dinner so the rest of the adults could do their own thing.  The first time I ever ate steamed clams was on an outing with Lil, Helen, and two cousins close to my age.  She took pleasure in introducing us to this new delicacy. 

Several times Helen and Lil invited me to go to the farm with them when my parents couldn’t make it that weekend, or couldn’t join us until later.  The three of us would sing popular songs on the drive.  None of us could carry a tune well, but we sure had fun.

Lil's dog King, taking a nap

When I was in high school, a friend of mine had a German Sheppard pup that they needed to give away.  I mentioned it to Lilly and she adopted King.  This was the only dog I ever knew her to own, and she loved him dearly.  She swore he understood everything she said and taught him some interesting tricks: like chewing gum and spitting it out and smoking a cigar.  This dog would sleep on a day-bed on the farm with Lil when she was there. Lil was heartbroken the day King wandered off into the woods on the farm and a hunter mistook him for a fox and shot him.

Lil on the farm

Lilly had strong opinions on everything and was not afraid to speak up and hold her ground in an argument.  She didn’t care about clothes, wearing whatever piece of cloth she got her hands on when she was not at work.  She enjoyed a good cigar and a beer, as well as some good ole hard cider from the keg in the farmhouse cellar. 

When I was about 13, I decided I wanted to volunteer as a Candy Striper for the summer.  Lilly worked at Elizabeth General Hospital at the time and she arranged for me to volunteer there.  That was the same summer that saw race riots all over the U.S.  She drove out of her way to pick me up each morning and bring me home at night, taking the long route to avoid driving through the blocked off areas of Newark, NJ.  We had plenty of time on the drives to talk and get to know each other.  

As Lilly got older, it got harder for her to get around.  Like several other members of our family, she developed FacioScapuloHumeral  Muscular Dystrophy (FSHD).   She retired early and was eventually confined to a wheelchair.  Helen had trouble with her balance, but they made a great pair.  Helen would push the wheelchair, holding onto it for balance as well.   Even as their lives got more difficult, they never stopped trying to help younger family members.   They continued to be there for great-nephews and nieces as they were for my generation.  

After retirement, Lil and Helen moved to the house in Edison that they had invested in years ago with their brother Bill.  The house was actually 2 houses, a large main house that they divided into 2 apartments and a small caretaker’s cottage in the back.  They moved into the cottage and continued to rent out the house for income. 

Helen, Mary, Lilly & Daisy on Mary's 90th Birthday, May 1997

Over the past few years, Lilly’s condition deteriorated both physically and mentally, to the point where Helen could no longer take care of her.  Helen was also beginning to need a wheelchair. Lilly was moved to a nursing home near one of my cousins.  My cousin was another of those who benefited greatly over the years from Helen and Lilly’s loving attention, and he paid back in kind.   He and his wife checked in on Lil regularly and made sure her bills were paid and she had everything she needed.  He also brought Helen to live in a house next door to him.  

Now they are both gone, but they will never be forgotten by any of the 13 nieces and nephews, their children, their children’s children, and all the friends whose lives they touched.  I’m sure my brothers, sister, nieces and nephews could add some great stories to this memoir and I hope they will.

To My Family: Thank You For Making Me Who I Am

Today I heard a podcast interview with the author of a new book “Cinderella Ate My Daughter (by Peggy Orenstein).”   It talks about the nature versus nurture aspects of raising a daughter to be comfortable in being a woman yet open to all the opportunities and possibilities in life.   This made me reflect on my own upbringing and to appreciate the way my parents allowed me to be who I am.  

I loved my father dearly and from an early age, spent as much time as I could with him.   When he worked on household repairs or on cars in the garage, I was often by his side offering to help.  He never turned me away.  There was always some little way I could help, like holding a flashlight or getting a tool he needed.  He wasn’t hesitant to teach me about what he was doing, and never made me feel like I couldn’t learn to do something because I was a girl.  In the evening when he was relaxing after a hard day’s work, I would sometimes sit with him on the front porch and he would tell me stories about the family.  Inside, we would watch TV together, westerns, Ed Sullivan, Red Skelton, and others.

My brothers also took his lead.  My oldest brother was married by the time I was 5, but he came to visit often, and “let me” help him wash his car.  When he restored an old car and when he built a boat in our back yard, he was happy to answer my questions and show off his work to me. 

My second brother taught me in other ways.  When I was little, he let me play with his toy cowboys and Indians in my sandbox, and built me a snow horse to ride in the winter.  He also tried to teach me how a car engine worked.  In addition to the cowboys and Indians, I also got to play with his old trains and erector sets. 

Now I don’t want to give anyone the impression that I was raised a tomboy.  I had plenty of dolls and stuffed animals to play with, and was a big Barbie fan.  I was also underfoot in the kitchen when my mother baked, which was just about every week.   When she trimmed the pie dough, she would give the remains to me and I would play that I was making little cookies, using the chairs as my oven, then eating the raw dough.   After awhile, my mom showed me how to make cinnamon and sugar cookies by rolling the excess dough into strips, adding cinnamon and sugar, rolling the strips and baking them.   In high school I took Home Economics, which was basically a class on cooking and meal presentation.   I remember the first meal I ever cooked at home was hamburgers, potatoes and vegetables, presented on a serving platter that I was very proud of.  My parents were supportive, encouraging and appreciative of that simple meal that I was so proud of.   After that, my mother would leave me in charge of dinner when she went to pick my father up from work in the evening.

My sister, who married when I was 8, taught me by example how to care for her babies and hired me as a baby-sitter by the time I was about 12 or 13.  Growing up, my favorite books were a series “Cherry Ames” about a nurse.  I read almost all of them, so in the summer between 8^th grade and high school, I volunteered to be a “candy striper”.  This was a hospital volunteer, who usually made beds, brought things to the wards on carts,  or did other non-skilled jobs to help the nurses.   Because my aunt was a XRay technician at a hospital, I volunteered to be there full time so I could ride back and forth from the hospital with my aunt.  As a result, they decided to use me as a receptionist in the hospital lab.  Although this summer activity made me realize I did not want to be a nurse after all, it opened my eyes to the many jobs that were out there and gave me a true respect for these hard working technicians.

My aunts and uncles also played a key role in my development.   The two aunts who were closest to me were single ladies who shared an apartment all their adult lives.  They were independent, working at city jobs during the week and helping out on the family farm on weekends.  My aunt and uncle who lived on the farm and ran it shared all the work.   I don’t think there was anything my uncle could do that my aunt couldn’t.  

The point is, my family gave me a very balanced view of the world, showing me that there were no limits in what I could learn or do, and that if I applied myself, the rewards would come.   I internalized their values and know that I have succeeded beyond anything they would have dreamed.   Thank you Mom, Dad, Brothers, Sister, Aunts, and Uncles.  I am who I am because of you.

Isaac Seeley 1798-abt 1885

The parents of Jonas Seeley were Isaac Seeley and Polly "Mary" Swingle.  They were both born in the South Canaan, PA area and were married around 1830.  It appears that they had 13 children:
Jonas (1831-1920)
John (1832-?)
Joseph (1835-?)
Benjamin (1837-?)
Samuel (1839-?)
Charles (1841-?)
Sarah (1843-?
Adam (1845-?
Anna (1846-?
Isaac (1848-1929)
Andrew (1849-?)
William (1852-?
Jacob (1854-?)

I don't know much more about this family.  Like most men of that time and place, Isaac was a farmer.  His parents were probably John & Dorothy, but I have not found anything to confirm that yet.   There are several men named Samuel Seeley at this time, one in Bradford County PA or one in Bucks County PA could be the same man, but I have been unable to prove that yet.  One of my future projects will be to survey the South Canaan Bible Protestant Cemetery where Jonas is buried.  There are many Seeleys there and I may be able to find some of Isaac's other children, and maybe even Isaac.  I know that my aunt Shirley was somehow descended from one of Jonas' brothers, but they lived off the beaten path and do not shoe up on many census records.  My search will continue.

James Oliver (1789-1850), Mary Hockaday and children

In a previous post I mentioned that my great-grandfather, Richard Paynter, married Ellen Oliver in 1867.  Ellen's parents were William Oliver (1822-1907) and Elizabeth Histead (1819-1895).  William's parents were James Oliver and Mary Hockaday.  Today I'd like to write about them, since they were the first of this line to come to the USA.  James was born on April 12, 1789 to John Olever and Mary Piper, in Pancrasweek, Devonshire, England.  He married Mary Hockaday on Feb 17, 1814.  Records were found by another researcher for 6 of their children who were baptised in Pancrasweek: John (Oct 13, 1816); James (Nov 6, 1818); William (July 25, 1822); Samuel (Nov 7, 1824); Lewis (Jan 21, 1827) and Elizabeth Anne (Mar 27 1831).

According to the Wayne County Pennsylvania Book:
"James Oliver came from Devonshire in 1831, and located just over the Berlin line.   His wife was Mary Hockady, and their children were:   John, James, drowned in 1832, William, Samuel, Lewis, Gideon, Elizabeth (Mrs. Thoamas Legg), Mary C, wife of Stephen Histed, Prudence, wife of John Oliver, Catherine (Mrs. Joseph May)."

From subsequent Wayne County PA census records, I believe Gideon was also born in England, between Lewis and Elizabeth, but that baptismal record was not located by the researcher mentioned above.  Mary, Prudence and Catherine were all born in Pennsylvania. So it appears that James and Mary came to Pennsylvania with 7 children.  From other notes I have found, it appears they followed the success of a Mr Piper.  Since James' mother's maiden name was Piper, I suspect this Mr. Piper was related.  Census records show the family settles in Oregon Township, north of Honesdale. 

The US Federal Census Mortality Schedules Index show that James died of "Bils Fever" in December, 1850.  It must have taken a while to settle his estate.  I found a deed in the Wayne Couty Courthouse dated March 6, 1868, in which Gideon and William Oliver obtained title to their father's farm by buying out their brothers' and sisters' shares of the estate.  The deed lists the residences of each of the children as follows:
John & Anna Oliver, Oregon Township, Pa
Thomas & Elizabeth Legg, Oregon Township, Pa
Joseph & Catherine May, Oregon Township, Pa
Samuel & Mary Oliver, Omaha City, Nebraska
John & Prudence Oliver, Dexter, Maine
Steven & (Mary) Charlotte Heisted, Waymart, Pa
Gideon Oliver, Oregon Township, Pa
William Oliver, Oregon Township, Pa
Lewis and James are missing from the list.   We know that James drowned around 1832 and I am assuming that Lewis died before the deed was conferred, possibly before the family left England.  I have not found Lewis in any US census records.

Gideon and William appear to have continued farming together for the remainder of their lives. I have located the graves of William and his wife Elizabeth (Histead) in the Indian Orchard cemetery along Rt 6 and place a flower there each Spring and at Thanksgiving.   I have not located James or Mary's headstones yet.

Jonas Seeley 1831-1920

Years ago, my Dad told me about his grandfather who lived with them when Dad was a little boy.  He didn't remember much other that his name and the fact that an old trunk he had once belonged to this grandfather.  My research has confirmed that this was Dad's great-grandfather, Jonas Seeley, and I still have the trunk that belonged to him.

Jonas was born on March 30, 1831 in Pennsylvania, probably in Wayne County.  he appears to have been the oldest of 13 children born to Isaac Seeley and Polly "Mary" Swingle.  Jonas married Eliza Jane Swingle around 1847.  I have located them in South Canaan in the 1850, 1860, 1870, and 1880 census records.  They had 10 children, Emarantha, Joseph, Adelia, Aldruda, Levin, Seldon, Jennette (Nettie), Annie, Janet, and Mary Grace. Adelia was the daughter I know of as Della, wife of Ashfield Gray and Dad's maternal grandmother.  Aldruda was Dad's stepmother, Joe Paynter's 3rd wife, after her niece and my grandmother died.

From the following record, I believe Jonas may have fought in the Civil War,
Seely Johns ,  
Enlistment Date:    19 November 1861 
Distinguished Service:    DISTINGUISHED SERVICE 
Side Served:    Union 
State Served:    Pennsylvania 
Unit Numbers:    2076 2076 
Service Record:    Enlisted as a Musician on 19 November 1861
Enlisted in Company B, 101st Infantry Regiment Pennsylvania on 19 November 1861.
Received a disability discharge Company B, 101st Infantry Regiment Pennsylvania on 15 April 1862


This other record could also refer to Jonas, although the age in this reference is off by 10 years:
 American Civil War Soldiers Record about Jonas S Seely:
Name: Jonas S Seely ,  
Enlistment Date: 05 March 1862 
Distinguished Service: DISTINGUISHED SERVICE 
Side Served: Union 
State Served: New York 
Unit Numbers: 1349 1349 
Service Record: Enlisted as a Private on 05 March 1862 at the age of 19
Enlisted in Company C, 5th Heavy Artillery Regiment New York on 07 March 1862.
Discharged to enlist in RA Company C, 5th Heavy Artillery Regiment New York on 23 January 1863
Enlisted in Company Batty L, 5th Light Artillery Regiment RA on 23 January 1863.

The photo here is of Carrie and Jonas sitting on the porch of their house.  Eliza died in 1888.  His grand-daughter Carrie probably came to live with him at that time.  The 1900 and 1910 census records show Jonas as the owner of a home at 234 Carbondale Road, Waymart, PA.  It also shows his grand-daughter Carrie Gray living with him.    When Carrie married Joe Paynter, Joe came to live in Jonas' house.  Jonas died on November 22, 1920, of broncial pheumonia.  He is buried with Eliza in the South Canaan Bible Protestant Cemetery, on Rt 296.  His obituary, from page 6 of the Carbondale Leader, November 26, 1920:

"Jonas Seeley Dies at Ripe Old Age

The death of Jonas Seeley of Waymart, Wayne County, which occurred Monday evening at Parsons following a sudden attach of pneumonia has been the source of a genuine regret among his circle of friends. Deceased was 89 years old and a lifelong resident of Wayne County, where he was well known and highly respected. Surviving are four children, Mrs Della Gray, Parsons, Seldon Seeley of this city, Mrs Aldrude Shager and Mrs Levin Shager of Kerrick Center, also four brothers, eight grandchildren and seventeen great grandchildren. Burial was made in South Canaan cemetery yesterday after services at 1:30 o'clock."

When Jonas died, he left the house to his granddaughter Carrie.  At her death, her two sons, Russell and Clayton inherited the house.  They keep the house until Joe Paynter died in 1952.

Looking for Input

Well, after about 30 posts, I've exhausted stories about deceased relatives who I have first or second hand knowledge about.  I hoped to get some input from other family members who might be able to fill in some more family lore, but other than some responses from my sister, that hasn't happened.  As a result, this blog will now move away from memories and more towards what I find in research.  That also means I may be posting less frequently.   Since I can't just write from memory on the other members of my tree, each future post will take a little more time to prepare.  If you have been reading this, please be patient with me.   If you really have an interest, please subscribe to this blog so you will be notified when I post new entries.  Thank you in advance for your patience.

Richard Paynter circa 1840-1877

This great grandfather is my biggest mystery and challenge.  The first fact I have that I am confident in is his marriage to Ellen Oliver on Nov 16, 1867, in Oregon, Wayne County, Pennsylvania, by the Rev. S. T. Cramp. This information is from a notice in the Honesdale Republic, Nov 27, 1867.  The couple appears in the 1870 living in Berlin Township with 2 children, Andrew and Richard.   The last record I found was a transaction dated June 12, 1874, in which Richard sold tree bark to Coe F. Young.  By the 1880 census, Ellen is listed as a widow with 5 children: Andrew, Richard, Mary Elizabeth, Amelia Anna and Joseph E.

Based on the information in the 1870 census, I believe he was born around 1842 in England.   There are a number of R. Paynters who can be found in the ship records of the era.  My best guess is with the record for a Richard Painter who arrived June 17, 1863 from Liverpool, England and Queenstown, Ireland on the ship Olympus.  He is listed as age 23, born about 1840. Going back into the English census records, I found a boy of the right age in 1851 and 1861, with parents Richard C. and Mary Paynter in Bermondsey, St. Mary Magdalen Parish, Surrey, England.  He is no longer with the family in the 1871 or 1881 census records.  If this is my great-grandfather, he may have had 6 siblings - Mary, Elizabeth, Thomasin, Henry William, John, and Maud.

I have found two other Richard Paynter's of the same approximate age.  The other two were born in 1838, one in Buckland Momachorum, Devonshire, England and the other in Calstock, Cornwall, England. Since the birth year for the Richard in Bermondsey is closer, I am leaning toward him being the right one.


I don't know exactly how or when Richard died, but the family story is that he was bitten by a rabid dog and died 41 days later.  I have been searching through old newspapers for evidence of this, but have not yet found it.  I have found stories of rabies in the area around that time.  I have not found his grave either.

Sometime between1880 and 1900 Ellen remarried John Gummoe.  Her older children were married by then and my grandfather, her youngest son Joseph, is shown living with and working for his sister Mary and her husband in 1900.  John appears to have had a son John from an earlier marriage living with him.  John was also born in England and the records I have found indicate that he had 7 children with his first wife Jane, John being the youngest.  A daughter, Verna also appears, born September 1887.  I am not sure whether she was a child of John and Ellen or the younger John's wife.  Ellen is buried with john Gummoe in the Aldenville Baptist Cemetery, Aldenville, Wayne County, Pa.

Abel Gray 1807-1887

Abel Gray was my great-great grandfather, and the father of Ashfield Gray.   Although it is difficult to be certain that I have tracked the correct person to birth, I believe he was born in Carlstadt, New Jersey on August 27, 1807. Sometime in the 1830's he married my great-great grandmother, Phoebe.  I don't know her maiden name yet.

There is are listings for a Phebe Gray and a John Gray in Hanover, New Jersey in 1830.  I think this may be a different Phebe. The 1830 census only shows the name of the head of the household.  This household includes a woman aged 50-60, who I'm guessing is this Phebe.  It also includes 1 boy aged 15-30, 2 girls aged 10-15 and 2 girls aged 15-30.  The household of John Gray  includes 1 boy & 1 girl aged 10-15 and a boy and a girl aged 15-30 In 1840.   Abel Gray would have been about 23 at this time, so he could be in either household.

I found Abel with his own family in Hanover, New Jersey in 1840, but they didn't stay there long.  By 1850 they had settled in Canaan Township, Wayne County, Pennsylvania, where they bought a farm and spent the rest of their lives. They appear to have had 9 children: Caroline, born about 1838; Charles, born about 1842; Caleb, born about 1843; Ashfield John, born about 1851; David, born about 1855; Daniel E., born about 1857; Ida, born about 1858; Ettie A. born about 1863; and Fanny E., born about 1861.  I say this appears true because the 8 year gap between Caleb and Ashfield seems suspicious.  I wonder if there may have been other children who didn't make it to adulthood.  

I found an obituary for Abel in the September 22, 1887 Honesdale Citizen.  It reads:
"Abel Gray died at his home in Canaan township, on Sunday evening, aged 82 years. He leaves a wife and five children. Deceased was born in New Jersey; came to Wayne county about forty years ago; was an honest, industrious and conscientious man, and a life-long Democrat."

Abel and Phoebe are buried in the Canaan Corners Cemetery, Waymart, PA.  I had found their headstone a few years back, then couldn't find it again though I kept looking every year.  Ray & I finally found it again this Spring.  The reason I couldn't find it was because I was looking for an old stone.  Something must have happened to the original stone, because they now have a fairly new one. That must mean there are cousins around taking care of the grave.  I hope I meet them someday.
By the way, there is a stone for Fanny nearby.

Ashfield John Gray abt 1851-1919

Carrie Gray's father was Ashfield Gray.  This man is one of several  mysteries that I have been trying for years to solve.  I have estimated his birth date based on census records and his death based on a plaque in the Canaan Corners cemetery.   Here is the little i have pieced together.
The first record for Ashfield is in the 1860 census.  He is listed as 8 years old, living with his parents, Abel & Phebe Gray, in Canaan, Wayne County, PA.  His brothers, Charles, Caleb, & Daniel, and a sister, Ida, are also listed.  In the 1870 census he is listed as John A. Gray, still living with his parents and working on the farm.  The only sibling shown is a sister Fanny E., who appears to have been born around 1861.
According to a notice in the Honesdale Citizen on July 26, 1877, he married Della Seely on July 22, 1877 at the Methodist Protestant parsonage in South Canaan.  The Rev.  M. Berriman presided.  The 1880 census shows John A. & Della Gray living in Fell, Lackawanna, Pennsylvania with 2 children, my grandmother Carrie age 1 and her brother Alfred, 4 months old.  His occupation is listed as farm laborer.

The 1890 Scranton, Pennsylvania Directories lists Ashfield as a laborer living at 181 Belmont Street in Carbondale.  By 1900, the family had moved to Plains Township near Wilkes Barre.  The census listing is incorrect.  His name is spelled Eshfield and Della is listed as Isabella.   Carrie had already moved to lived with her grandfather by this time, but the 2 younger children, Alfred and Isabella are shown.  The 1910 census listed John as a fireman in Parsons, Luzerne, PA, with Della as the head of the household and only Alfred remaining with his parents.  The Wilkes-Barre City DIrectory for 1917 & 1918 list Ashfield J. Gray as an engineer living at 423 Hollenbeck Ave, Parsons. In the 1920 census, Della is shown as a widow.

I have only 2 clues to Ashfield's death.  One is a small green marker I found in the Canaan Corners Cemetery, in Waymart, PA, with his name, birth and death years (shown here).

The other is a story my father told me, that his grandfather died in a "buggy accicent"  I have found no other evidence of this, but I am continuing my search.

Carrie Idelia Gray 1878-1922

I know very little about my father's mother.  She was born on June 15, 1878 to Ashfield John Gray and Adelia (Della) Seely Gray.  Carrie was the oldest of 3 children. Her younger sister, Arabella (or Isabella) married Augustus (Gus) James Fitzsimmons and had 8 children. Her brother, Alfred, may have had a mental disability.  He lived with his mother most of his life but was found in the Retreat Hospital for the Insane, Newport, PA in the 1920 census.  I have located a 1914 newspaper article in which he reportedly attacked his mother. The headline on this article is as follows:
"Crazed, Twice Shoots Defender of Mother
Fires Bullet Into Border's Head and Hand, Then Barricades Himself for Twelve Hours"
In 1930 he was back living with his mother.  In her will, Della specified that Alfred was to be cared for.

Carrie was born in Fell Township, Lackawanna, PA.  She appear there with her parents in the 1880 census.  By 1900, she appears in South Canaan, living with her grandfather, Jonas Seely (photo at left) and is still living there in 1910.  Sometime in the next few years she met and married my grandfather, Joseph Paynter. They had 2 sons, Russell born in 1913 and Clayton, born in 1916.  The marriage was short however.  Carrie contracted breast cancer and died Feb 1, 1922.   She was 43 years old.   Here is her obituary, from the Wayne Independent, Honesdale, PA, Feb 7, 1922:

"The funeral of Mrs. Joseph Paynter was held last Friday afternoon at one o'clock at her late home in Waymart and was largely attended by friends and relatives. The services were in charge of Rev. Mr. Lloyd, pastor of the Presbyterian church of which the deceased was a member.  Mrs. Paynter was a highly respected resident of Waymart where she spent the greater part of her life. She is survived by her husband and two little sons, Russell and Clayton, aged 9 and 6; also by her mother, Mrs. Della Gray; one brother, Alfred of Parsons; one sister, Mrs. G. Fitzsimmons of Forest City."

Carrie is buried in Canaan Corners cemetery, next to Joseph.

Joseph E. Paynter 1875-1952

When I first started this blog, I wrote about my mothers parents.  Today I am going to document what I know about my father's father.  Joseph was the 5th child of Richard Paynter and Ellen Oliver Paynter.  Born on Dec 11, 1875, he was probably about 2 or 3 years old when his father died. His mother remarried when he was about 9.  I found him in the 1880 census in Oregon Township, Wayne County, PA with his widowed mother, his brothers and sisters. In the 1900 census, he can be found living in his married sister's household, designated as a servant.

For awhile he worked as a glass-cutter, making some beautiful cut-glass vases, dishes, and jewelry. When I was a child, I remember being allowed to wear a lovely cut-glass heart on a necklace chain.  One day the chain broke and the heart cracked when it hit the sidewalk on my way home from school.  I was devastated.  Later, he worked as a guard at Farview Hospital for the Criminal Insane, in Waymart, PA.  This was a model establishment, meant to test ways to rehabilitate inmates and teach them skills while making the complex self-sufficient.  From a booklet I read called "The Farview State Hospital Agricultural Complex,"  the guards were called overseers and their job was mostly to supervise the inmates work around the complex.  The inmates farmed and did all the repairs around the complex as a rehabilitation therapy and to offset the cost of keeping them incarcerated.
   
Joe was married three times. His first wife, Bertha Highouse gave him two sons and a daughter. The second son, Nelson, died at 8 months old. Bertha was pregnant again when her youngest child died, and she committed suicide.  After her death, the 2 older children, Enos and Violet, were sent to live with Bertha's parents, Enos Highhouse and Barbara Gredlein Highhouse.

Around 1911 Joe married his second wife, Carrie Grey. They had two sons, Russel and my Dad, Clayton.  This marriage was not meant to last either.  Carrie contracted breast cancer and died in 1922.  At this point, Joe was left with a teenage daughter and 2 little boys, 9 & 6 years old.  Carrie's aunt, Aldrude Shager was a widow 16 years older than Joe.  She came to take care of the children and Joe eventually married her in order to maintain proper appearances.  Aldrude stayed with Joe until she died in 1940.
    When Clayton and Daisy Orinick married in 1936, they moved in with Joe, since the house he lived in had been left to Clayton and his brother Russell in their grandfather's will (Jonas Seely). Daisy cared for Joe as he got older and began to forget who everyone was. Clayton got a job in New Jersey during WWII and came home on weekends. When the war was over, Russell came home and Daisy and the children moved to New Jersey. Russell couldn't care for Joe the way Daisy had, so he put his father in a nursing home. Joe died there in 1952.  This was 6 months before I was born, so I never got to meet him.

Obituary from The Wayne Independent, Honesdale, PA Feb 26, 1952:
Joseph E. Paynter, 75, formerly of Waymart, died Friday, Feb 22, 1952 at the Leidfrost Nursing Home, Beachlake, after a long illness. He was a native of Bethany. Surviving are three sons; Enos, Akron, O., Russell, Metuchean, N.J., and Clayton, Lyndhurst, N.J. Services were held at the Gerald A. Ball Funeral Home, Waymart, Sunday at 2p.m.  Rev. Russell A. Edwards, pastor, Waymart Baptist Church will officiate. Interment was in Canaan Corners Cemetery, Waymart.

Growing up without a father and outliving 3 wives must have made his life very sad.  I am hoping that either one of my 2 brothers or my sister, who did get to meet him when he was alive, will read this and add their memories of Grandpa Joe. 

Theodore Michael Orinick 1925-2009

This week I'm back on my mother's family.  The 9th surviving child of Matthew & Anna Orinick was my uncle Ted.  Born in 1925, he was only 10 years old when his father died and 14 when he mother died.  His brothers were 8 and 10 years older than he and not a major influence in his teenage years, so I don't think he had a lot of male guidance.  Sometime in the late 1940's he joined the Army and served in Korea.   When he returned he married a local South Canaan girl, Shirley Seeley.  This was around the time his brother Bill's marriage was breaking up, so it was natural for Ted & Shirley to take over the family farm.   They ran the farm until around 1970 and most of my childhood memories of them are centered there.  They had 3 sons there.  The first died at birth, but the other two were close to my age and we became like siblings growing up.  I looked forward to spending my weekends with these "cousin/brothers" and they spend time some summers at our house in New Jersey.
The farm was primarily a dairy farm.  The house is still there, but the barns are long gone. The house sits on a hill with the barn and an equipment shed at the bottom of the hill and across the dirt road.   Ted & Shirley would get up before dawn each morning to go down to the barn and milk the cows.  Their 2 boys went down to work too.  After the morning milking was done, they would let the cows out into the fields to graze during the day.   In the evening the cows would wander back toward the gate and we would go let them back into the barn.   I was always facinated by the fact that each cow knew it's own stanchion and would go right to the correct place.  
When I visited on weekends, I would wake up with the sun, get dressed, and head down the hill to join them. In the evening I would join them again to help. Part of this was because my cousins were there and I was looking for something to do.  When I was very young,  they may have milked by hand, but milk machines and a holding tank were installed early on. I have a vague memory of uncle Ted showing off he brand new equipment.  I was always curious about the cows and helped where I could.   I tried a few times to attach the milking machines, but wasn't very good at it.  I was always afraid of the cows kicking me.  Mostly I remember feeding the cows hay, silage, and a reddish mixture that was supposed to be a bovine dietary supplement.   I think they only got this in the winter when they couldn't go out of the barn.
In addition to caring for the cows, working the farm involved clearing the fields and planting hay and corn for winter feed.   This was very hard work and the only return was what they could earn from the sale of the milk.   They also raised pigs, a few chickens, and the occasional pheasant. They lived almost entirely off the land.   There was a large vegetable garden behind the house and the family diet was supplemented by the occasional hunting expedition for deer, rabbit, and pheasant.  There were also a few ponds in the area where the owning neighbors would allow us to fish.   In the spring we all went out into the woods to pick blueberries,  which were made into jellies or frozen for future use in cakes and pies.   In the fall we would pick apples from several trees on the farm.  Ted would take bushels of apples to the local Cider Mill and come home with a barrel or 2 of apple cider.  This started as benign, but after sitting in the barrels in the cellar over the winter, this became a potent brew for spring enjoyment.

They also had a wonderful love and respect for nature.  This 1975 photo shows them with a pair of fawns they "fostered" when the mother deer had been killed.  They raised these babies until they were old enough to fend for themselves, then released them.
Around 1980 Ted & Shirley decided they had enough of the farm life.  A nearby tavern was up for sale and they decided they would but it.   This was a complicated transaction because my grandfather's will stated that the farm could not be sold as long as any of his daughter's remained single.  They were always to have a home there.  Three of Ted's sisters were still single and Mary still lived on the farm, caring for the house and the boys.   The solution was to split the farm in half.   Ted & Shirley built a second house on their half and turned a marshy area between the two houses into a pond.  They stocked it with fish so they had their own fishing hole.
Owning a tavern proved to be hard work as well and Shirley's health was becoming an issue.  Around 1985 they sold the tavern and moved to Hiddennite, North Carolina.  This location was chosen because a doctor who Shirley was seeing either lived there or had just moved there.   The cost of living in North Carolina was low enough so they were able to live there comfortably with the money from the sale of the tavern and their half of the farm.  They lived there until Shirley died in 2005.
After Shirley died, Ted sold the house in Hiddenite and returned to Pennsylvania.   At first he lived with his son, but that didn't work out.  They found him an apartment and, eventually, a place in a nursing home.  I have heard that he was involved with a younger woman during his final years and spent what money he had liberally on her.   I hope he enjoyed these final years.  Uncle Ted passed away last year, on Spet 27, 2009.
Ted was a gruff man and a hard drinker, but he had a boyish quality to him.  Some young children were afraid of him  but I don't think I ever was.  I saw him as someone whose bark was worse than his bite and always admired how hard he worked and how he cared for the farm animals.   As with most of the members of my family, I am glad to have known him.

Russell Laverne Paynter 1913-1981

My Dad's only full sibling was his brother Russell.  Born on August 30, 1913 to Joseph and Carrie Paynter, Russell had a very different personality from my Dad, but they remained close all their lives. Russ found jobs in Rye New York for both him and my Dad inn the 1930's.  According to my Dad, Russ married Bonnie Edens around 1939, but the marriage only lasted 8 days.  On September 16, 1942 he enlisted in the army and his status is listed as "Separated, without dependents."  His address on his enlisted record is shown as Hampden, Massachusetts.   Between 1942 and 1946, Russ served as a PFC in the US Army.  He served in the Philippines on a road construction crew.
After the war he had a variety of jobs.  He got his pilot's license and bought an Aeroonca Champ, which he often flew from Honesdale, PA to Edison, NJ.  The Honesdale airfield was a small grass strip, located just west of town and is now the site of a grocery store.  I am not sure where the New Jersey airport was, but it was also a grass strip.  My Dad told me that one time they got to NJ after dark and he held a flashlight out the window of the airplane so Russell could see to land.   Luckily, the Champ was a slow airplane. 
In the early 1950's he met and married Sarah Jane Delosier.  They lived in Edison, New Jersey where Russ had a watch repair shop,  and had a son in 1955.  About 1958 they moved to Riverside, California, near Russ's half brother Enos and friend Doug Reed.  I believe he had a watch repair shop there for a while, then went to work at Lockheed.  As I mentioned in my blog about Enos, my Dad, Mom, sister & I drove across country in 1959 to visit them.  I remember their house was a ranch style house on a dead-end street, with fruit trees in the back yard.  At the end of the road was a fence and an open stretch of land, which I think was Orange County Airport.  I remember my cousin having a great model train set in the garage which he & I played with.   He also had an organ that he was learning to play, and that sparked my desire to learn to play too.  (Santa brought me an organ the next Christmas.)
While in California they experienced a 2nd pregnancy but the child died.  In 1965 they adopted a second son. Over the years I made 2 more trips across the country with my parents to visit them and they came back to New Jersey to visit at least 2 times.   While visiting them in California we went to Disney Land, Knotts Berry Farm, and Mexico.   When they came back to New Jersey, Russ took my cousin and I to Coney Island and we went to the New York World's Fair.  We also visited Sarah's elderly aunt in New York City.
On one trip Russ and my cousin came with us as far as Las Vegas and spent a few days their with us before we started home.   We saw Hoover Dam and the adults played at the casinos.  Children weren't allowed in the casinos at the time, so my cousin and I spent the day in a movie theater set up as a place to drop off the kids.  I will never forget watching "The River of No Return" and "The Great Escape" at least twice through each waiting for the adults to come back for us.  On another day, I remember standing outside the casino window with my parents at slot machines just inside where we could see them, and watching the big neon cowboy wave Howdee.  We were fine and there wasn't a second thought to us waiting outside at the time, but something like that would never be allowed today.
On another trip, Russ and my cousin joined us as we drove north to Seattle to see the Seattle World's fair.   We stopped to see the giant Sequoia trees and Crater Lake along the way.  I have a photo of my cousin and I standing by the giant Sequoia that had a tunnel carved out of it for cars to drive through. 
My parents made several more trips to California after I was out on my own.  My Dad and Russell wrote letters to each other regularly over the years and, when reel-to-reel tape recorders became available, they began sending tapes back and forth.  I have a collection of the tapes Russell sent to my father.  Dad saved them all.
At some point, Russell and Sarah joined the Seventh Day Adventist Church.  I don't know how involved they were in the church, but Russ sent us literature occasionally.  Russ also liked to drink and go to the horse races with his friend Lenny.  I don't now how those two concepts co-existed.  From a distance I cannot say why, but in July 1977, Russell and Sarah were divorced and Russell moved into an apartment.  His drinking was his eventual downfall.  On June 12, 1981, as he walked home intoxicated, he was mugged and killed.  He is buried in Riverside National Cemetery, Riverside, California.

Violet Paynter Doney 1905-1933

Joseph and Bertha Paynter had two other children after Enos.  Their third child, Nelson only lived to be about 7 months old.  Their second child, was my Dad's half-sister Violet.  After her mother died, she and Enos went to live with her mother's parents, as shown in the 1910 census.  However, in the 1920 census she is found living with her father Joseph and his second wife, my grandmother, Carrie.  Since Carrie was probably already very sick at this time and my father and his brother were 4 and 7, she was probably taking care of them to some extent.  The photo to the right is the only photo I have of her.  This was cropped from a photo of her pulling her two half-brothers in a sleigh, so I estimate her age as about 15 or 16.

My Dad always spoke of her with a great deal of love.  One unusual and trivial comment sticks in my mind.  Dad told me that Violet admired the "crescent moons" of his fingernails. Violet married Carletos Henry Doney on September 28, 1923, when she was 18 years old.  Her marriage license shows that she was working in a factory at the time and he was a machinist.   Carletos also had friends in the circus and may have worked in the circus himself for a time.  The photo on the left is the only one I have of him, and it is labeled as being Carletos with his circus friends.


After their marriage, Violet and Carl lived in Washington, DC for a while.  They had 2 children, Leroy born in 1924 and Marjorie born in 1927.  By 1930 they had separated and Violet was working as a servant in Queens New York.  She died on April 12, 1933 in a New York hospital, at the age of 28.   Her cause of death is listed as "Chronic Endoceovicites. Post Quarter shock and hemorage."   I have not been able to find a definition for the medical term "Endoceovicites."   Violet is buried in Canaan Corners Cemetery, outside of Waymart, PA, in the Paynter family plot.  Her two children went to live with her father Joseph and his 3rd wife, Adrude.

Enos Joseph Paynter 1903-1968

Enos was my father's oldest brother.  He was actually Dad's half-brother, son of Joseph Paynter and his first wife, Bertha Highhouse.  His mother died when he was only 5 and he and his younger sister Violet went to live with their maternal grandparents while Joseph coped with the loss.  I know this from the 1910 census entry I found for him in Texas Township, PA.  I believe his Lutheran religion came from living with these grandparents.   Although his younger sister went back to live with their father by 1920,  I have not found Enos in the 1920 or 1930 census records, so I don't know where he went from there.  

Sometime around 1931 he married Mabel Irene Burdett.  This marriage ended in divorce.  Around 1940 he met and married an opera singer, Marie (Helen) Smith.  They remained together until his death in 1968.

Enos was a self-taught man. He earned his high school and engineering degrees through correspondence courses.   His engineering knowledge got him a wartime job with Otis Elevator in New Jersey, so he and Marie moved to Carlstadt.   This proved a opening for many of his friends and family back in Pennsylvania who were looking for jobs.  Through his recommendation, my Dad went to work for Otis, and so did Frank Benonus (Mom's sister's husband), Myron, John & Joe Orinick (Mom's cousins).  

Around 1950, Enos landed a job as an engineer with Lockheed and they moved to Downey, California.  He worked on the Apollo rocket program and got to meet and work with some of the astronauts.  The photo at the right was taken in Phoenix, Arizona in 1950, so this may have been while they were en route to their new home.    Enos carried his technical expertise into his private life as well.   His hobby was electronics and his house was full of every imaginable gadget available at the time. Since Marie had severe arthritus, many of these were to make her life easier. They both also loved music and had a great stereo system.

I only met them 3 times as a child, on our 3 trips to California, so I did not know them well.  My Dad kept in touch through letters.  Enos died on December 1, 1968.  My Mom and Dad flew to California for the funeral, so I have the funeral card.  It reads:

"In Memory of Enos J. Paynter
Born June 29, 1903 Honesdale, Pennsylvania
Passed Away December 1, 1968 San Diego, California
Services Memory Chapel of the Miller Downey Mortuary Thursday, December 5, 1968 2:00PM
Officiating Rev. Vernon F. Jacobs, Pastor Christ Lutheran Church
Private Inurnment service Concludes at Chapel"

After Enos' death, Marie moved to a continuing care retirement community in La Guna Hills, California.  She lived to 92, going to follow Enos on March 3, 1990.

Cross-Country Vacations - Part 1

When I was a little girl, my father's 2 brothers moved to California.  I will talk about them later.  Today I want to tell you about the first of 3 trips I made with my parents across the country to visit these relatives.

 In 1959 my parents bought a brand new silver Oldsmobile 88.  This car would one day be the car I learned to drive in, but at the time it was going to be our transportation on a great adventure.  My Dad, Mom, sister and I would embark on our first trip across the USA.  My oldest brother was already married and my next brother was in the Air Force.  My sister wasn't thrilled about the trip because she had recently gotten engaged and didn't want to be away from her fiance for 3 whole weeks, but she went anyway.  I was seven years old, and didn't understand the magnitude of what we were about to do.  We had driven 8 hrs to upstate every year for vacation, so I wasn't upset about a long drive.  I liked to sing, and had recently learned a new song, "Michael Row the Boat Ashore", which I sang all the way across the country, driving everyone in the car crazy.

We started the drive from New Jersey with AAA maps and trip-tiks in hand in August. We had a movie camera and a 35MM camera with slide film to document our trek,  The first marvel was the tunnels that had been carved through the mountains in Pennsylvania.   It took about 5 days to drive across country and my Mom made sure we stopped at as many tourist spots along the was as possible.  I think we drove to Chicago and then picked up Route 66.   According to Wikipedia, "The famous highway originally ran from Chicago, Illinois, through Missouri, Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, and California, before ending at Los Angeles, encompassing a total of 2,448 miles (3,940 km)."  Our destination was Riverside, California, just east of L.A. and this was our route.


Growing up, my Dad had made lifelong friends with the Reed boys, 5 brothers who lived near his boyhood home in Pennsylvania.  One of the brothers (Doug?) had settled in Missouri with his wife and 2 daughters, so we stopped for a day to visit them along the way.  


The trip was pretty uneventful until we got to the mountains.  I only remember 2 things about that - that the narrow, winding mountain roads frightened my mother, and that my sister got to drive down the mountain from Flagstaff, Arizona.   I also remember stopping to visit the Petrified Forrest.  However, the event that stands out most in my mind was the last few hours before we arrived at my uncle's house.  We crossed Death Valley that day, and were told later that it had been 120 degrees in the shade.  This was before cars had air conditioning.  We had a cooler with food and fruit juices in the back and my Mom got a large soda size container of ice which she held up to the car's vent windows so it blew the moisture back at us.  We arrived at my uncle and aunt's house sometime in the afternoon.


During that visit we did lots of fun things.  While staying at my uncle Russell's house visited a second Reed brother (Dick?),  my Dad's step-brother Enos and his wife Marie, went to the recently opened Disney Land, and went down to Tijuana, Mexico to the horse races.  I have snippets of memories from each of these.  My uncle Enos had an intercom system throughout the house and they had lots of special appliances because his wife had severe arthritis and was loosing her hearing.  The Reed family had a house that had adjustable walls, so they could change room sizes or make two rooms into one as their needs changed.  On our way back from Mexico I remember waiting in a line of cars to go through the border and boys along the way were selling souvenirs.  I have a Mexican doll puppet, and I believe we bought it from one of these boys. 


On the way home we took a southern route so we could stop to visit my brother, who was stationed in Biloxi Mississippi.  I think he was there for Basic Training.  My mother made a point of getting out on the beach and putting her feet in the waters of the Gulf of Mexico.  She had done the same in the Pacific Ocean and we had often been to the Great Lakes, so, along with our trips to the Jersey Shore, she could now say she had set foot in the water on all sides of the USA.


The only other thing I remember about this trip was swimming in a pool at a motel somewhere in the South with my sister.  I think this motel may not have been on AAA's recommended list, and the place sticks in my mind because my Mom was not happy with it.  However, I believe it was all we could find and was probably the last night before we got back home.   We must have gotten back after Labor Day, because I was a few days late starting school that year.   I remember having trouble finding where I should line up in the playground to go into class.  All the other kids already knew, but I had a few minutes of confusion until a teacher pointed me in the right direction.   But I did have the best story that year for what I did on my summer vacation.

Missing Week

Last week I broke my commitment to publish an entry every week.  Between our return from a week's vacation and my leaving on a business trip to California first thing Monday morning, I just ran out of time.  However, the trip to California brought back a lot of memories that I am going to turn into this week's blog entry, Stay tuned.

List of Graves Found

When I wrote my last post this morning, I must have been half asleep, because I missed 2 relatives, bringing the total to 32.   Here's the whole list of graves I tend in PA, and their relationship to me.  See if you can tell me who I missed this morning:

Canaan Corners Cemetery:
Clayton & Daisy Paynter (parents)
Joseph & Carrie Paynter (paternal grandparents)
Violet Paynter (aunt)
Leroy Doney (first cousin)
Abel & Phoebe Gray (great-great grandparents)
Ashfield Gray (great grandfather)

St Tikhons:
Mathew& Anna Orinick (maternal grandparents)
Julia & Jack Reger (aunt & uncle)
Catherine Zedar (aunt)
Mary Orinick (aunt)
Margaret Orinick (aunt)
Helen Orinick (aunt)

East Canaan Cemetery:
Ted & Shirley Orinick (uncle & aunt)

South Canaan Protestant Cemetery:
Jonas & Jane Seeley (great-great grandparents)

Aldenville Baptist Cemetery
Ellen (Oliver Paynter) Gummoe & John Gummoe (great-grandmother & her 2nd husband)

Union Dale Cemetery:
John Zedar (uncle & godfather)
Aldrude & Jacob Shager (great aunt & grandfather's 3rd wife, with her 1st husband, who would be my great uncle)
Nettie & Levi Shager (great aunt & uncle

Indian Orchard:
William & Elizabeth Oliver (great-great grandparents)
Elizabeth & Adolphus Henshaw (great aunt & uncle)

Finding Dead Relatives

I am a little late posting a blog entry this week.  We're vacationing in the hills of Pennsylvania this week and in my desire to unwind, I forgot to write this weekend.  No excuses, the beauty of my surroundings and the need to do absolutely nothing for the first 2 days took over.   Yesterday we ventured out to perform an our bi-annual task of love and remembrance - visiting the graves of relatives I have found.

It began many years ago.  When I was a little girl, Mom & Dad took me to the cemeteries around Memorial Day each year to plant flowers on some graves.  We visited Mom's parents at St Tikhon's and Dad's parents and half-sister in Canaan Corners.  After Dad died,  Mom took care of these and a few more.  Two of her sisters were buried at St Tikhon's before my Dad died and another sisters was buried there shortly after.  That brought the number of graves to care for to 8.  Although I always had an interest, after my Dad passed away, I began working on the family genealogy more earnestly.  I began asking my mother and other relatives more questions.  Mom and I took a few drives around the Pennsylvania countryside as she tried to remember where other graves were located.  We found my Dad's step-mother Aldrude Shager and added her to the list.  Her sister Nettie, who is also a great-aunt, is buried nearby.   Both are with their Shager husbands, so that brings the number to 12. Down the hill, my godfather John Zedar is buried across the road, making it 13.

A big breakthrough in my search for graves came when I first visited the Wayne County Historical Society library in Honesdale, PA.  Someone had compiled a list of headstones in county cemeteries and donated it to the library.  It wasn't an exhaustive list, but I found a few familiar names to investigate.  one was my grandpa Joe Paynter's mother, Ellen.  She is buried with her second husband, John Gummoe, in a little cemetery across from the Aldenville Baptist church.  The other discovery was Ellen's parents, William Oliver and Elizabeth Histead Oliver in Indian Orchard.  Next to them is their daughter Elizabeth with her husband.   Adding these 3 couples brings the number to 19.  

My Dad told me years ago that he had a grandfather buried in South Canaan Bible Protestant Cemetery, but he thought there was no headstone so I didn't look there right away.  I always thought it was Dad's mother's father, Ashfield Gray, but one day I found a small green marker with Ashfield's name, birth & death dates on someone else's grave in Canaan Corners.  Why that marker is where it is remains a mystery, but I honor great-grandfather Ashfield there.  However, that made me wonder who might be in South Canaan.  It didn't take much effort to find my great-great grandparents Jonas Seeley and Jane Swingle Seeley just to the right of the entrance road, about a third of the way into the cemetery.   The number was now 22.  

During the years of searching, my father, mother, 2 more of my mother's sisters and my father's nephew Leroy have died, bringing the number to 27.   Yesterday we drove around Susquehanna and Wayne counties, planting a few small flowers near each headstone.  We saved Canaan Corners for last.  A few years back I found another set of great-great grandparents there, but could never find the headstone again.   I made a cursory search each time i visited but was frustrated each year.  This year, we had more time to spare, so Ray & I began the search again for Ashfield's parents Abel & Phoebe Gray.   We were almost ready to give up when we both spotted the headstone at the same time.  What had confused me on previous attempts was that the old stone has been replaced with a new one.  The stone I found the first time was a large and typical gray  headstone.  Something must have happened to the original because it has been replaced with a new, smaller, pink headstone.  There is also another stone near the foot of this grave for Fannie Gray. Her birth date is 1860, so she could very well be another of Abel & Phoebe's children.  I don't have documentation for that yet, but I placed a flower near her stone too.  That makes 30.   

I also know where several of my grandpa Joe's brothers and sisters are buried in Clinton Corners, but I don't bring flowers there because they have local descendants to remember them.  I have documented that entire cemetery and donated my list to the Wayne County web site, but they have never uploaded it.  First chance I get, I will upload it to Find-A-Grave.

On a side note, yesterday's cemetery visits had a moment of excitement.   After planting flowers by the grave of Jonas & Jane Seeley in South Canaan, we got in the car and started to drive away.  The road in the cemetery leads around it, so we were heading towards the woods at the back to exit on the side road.  All of a sudden a huge black bear ran out of the woods and across the cemetery in front of us.  All I could do was say "bear" to get Ray's attention.  He was driving slowly on the dirt road and was able to stop easily, but I could not get my camera out in time.   This was a beautiful, majestic creature, at least 800 pounds.  I don't know whether the sound of the car scared him or he was running from something else, but he was wonderful to see.  We are glad we were already in the car thou.   I don't know what I would have done if I was still out there planting flowers.