Abel Gray 1807-1887

Abel Gray was my great-great grandfather, and the father of Ashfield Gray.   Although it is difficult to be certain that I have tracked the correct person to birth, I believe he was born in Carlstadt, New Jersey on August 27, 1807. Sometime in the 1830's he married my great-great grandmother, Phoebe.  I don't know her maiden name yet.

There is are listings for a Phebe Gray and a John Gray in Hanover, New Jersey in 1830.  I think this may be a different Phebe. The 1830 census only shows the name of the head of the household.  This household includes a woman aged 50-60, who I'm guessing is this Phebe.  It also includes 1 boy aged 15-30, 2 girls aged 10-15 and 2 girls aged 15-30.  The household of John Gray  includes 1 boy & 1 girl aged 10-15 and a boy and a girl aged 15-30 In 1840.   Abel Gray would have been about 23 at this time, so he could be in either household.

I found Abel with his own family in Hanover, New Jersey in 1840, but they didn't stay there long.  By 1850 they had settled in Canaan Township, Wayne County, Pennsylvania, where they bought a farm and spent the rest of their lives. They appear to have had 9 children: Caroline, born about 1838; Charles, born about 1842; Caleb, born about 1843; Ashfield John, born about 1851; David, born about 1855; Daniel E., born about 1857; Ida, born about 1858; Ettie A. born about 1863; and Fanny E., born about 1861.  I say this appears true because the 8 year gap between Caleb and Ashfield seems suspicious.  I wonder if there may have been other children who didn't make it to adulthood.  

I found an obituary for Abel in the September 22, 1887 Honesdale Citizen.  It reads:
"Abel Gray died at his home in Canaan township, on Sunday evening, aged 82 years. He leaves a wife and five children. Deceased was born in New Jersey; came to Wayne county about forty years ago; was an honest, industrious and conscientious man, and a life-long Democrat."

Abel and Phoebe are buried in the Canaan Corners Cemetery, Waymart, PA.  I had found their headstone a few years back, then couldn't find it again though I kept looking every year.  Ray & I finally found it again this Spring.  The reason I couldn't find it was because I was looking for an old stone.  Something must have happened to the original stone, because they now have a fairly new one. That must mean there are cousins around taking care of the grave.  I hope I meet them someday.
By the way, there is a stone for Fanny nearby.

Ashfield John Gray abt 1851-1919

Carrie Gray's father was Ashfield Gray.  This man is one of several  mysteries that I have been trying for years to solve.  I have estimated his birth date based on census records and his death based on a plaque in the Canaan Corners cemetery.   Here is the little i have pieced together.
The first record for Ashfield is in the 1860 census.  He is listed as 8 years old, living with his parents, Abel & Phebe Gray, in Canaan, Wayne County, PA.  His brothers, Charles, Caleb, & Daniel, and a sister, Ida, are also listed.  In the 1870 census he is listed as John A. Gray, still living with his parents and working on the farm.  The only sibling shown is a sister Fanny E., who appears to have been born around 1861.
According to a notice in the Honesdale Citizen on July 26, 1877, he married Della Seely on July 22, 1877 at the Methodist Protestant parsonage in South Canaan.  The Rev.  M. Berriman presided.  The 1880 census shows John A. & Della Gray living in Fell, Lackawanna, Pennsylvania with 2 children, my grandmother Carrie age 1 and her brother Alfred, 4 months old.  His occupation is listed as farm laborer.

The 1890 Scranton, Pennsylvania Directories lists Ashfield as a laborer living at 181 Belmont Street in Carbondale.  By 1900, the family had moved to Plains Township near Wilkes Barre.  The census listing is incorrect.  His name is spelled Eshfield and Della is listed as Isabella.   Carrie had already moved to lived with her grandfather by this time, but the 2 younger children, Alfred and Isabella are shown.  The 1910 census listed John as a fireman in Parsons, Luzerne, PA, with Della as the head of the household and only Alfred remaining with his parents.  The Wilkes-Barre City DIrectory for 1917 & 1918 list Ashfield J. Gray as an engineer living at 423 Hollenbeck Ave, Parsons. In the 1920 census, Della is shown as a widow.

I have only 2 clues to Ashfield's death.  One is a small green marker I found in the Canaan Corners Cemetery, in Waymart, PA, with his name, birth and death years (shown here).

The other is a story my father told me, that his grandfather died in a "buggy accicent"  I have found no other evidence of this, but I am continuing my search.

Carrie Idelia Gray 1878-1922

I know very little about my father's mother.  She was born on June 15, 1878 to Ashfield John Gray and Adelia (Della) Seely Gray.  Carrie was the oldest of 3 children. Her younger sister, Arabella (or Isabella) married Augustus (Gus) James Fitzsimmons and had 8 children. Her brother, Alfred, may have had a mental disability.  He lived with his mother most of his life but was found in the Retreat Hospital for the Insane, Newport, PA in the 1920 census.  I have located a 1914 newspaper article in which he reportedly attacked his mother. The headline on this article is as follows:
"Crazed, Twice Shoots Defender of Mother
Fires Bullet Into Border's Head and Hand, Then Barricades Himself for Twelve Hours"
In 1930 he was back living with his mother.  In her will, Della specified that Alfred was to be cared for.

Carrie was born in Fell Township, Lackawanna, PA.  She appear there with her parents in the 1880 census.  By 1900, she appears in South Canaan, living with her grandfather, Jonas Seely (photo at left) and is still living there in 1910.  Sometime in the next few years she met and married my grandfather, Joseph Paynter. They had 2 sons, Russell born in 1913 and Clayton, born in 1916.  The marriage was short however.  Carrie contracted breast cancer and died Feb 1, 1922.   She was 43 years old.   Here is her obituary, from the Wayne Independent, Honesdale, PA, Feb 7, 1922:

"The funeral of Mrs. Joseph Paynter was held last Friday afternoon at one o'clock at her late home in Waymart and was largely attended by friends and relatives. The services were in charge of Rev. Mr. Lloyd, pastor of the Presbyterian church of which the deceased was a member.  Mrs. Paynter was a highly respected resident of Waymart where she spent the greater part of her life. She is survived by her husband and two little sons, Russell and Clayton, aged 9 and 6; also by her mother, Mrs. Della Gray; one brother, Alfred of Parsons; one sister, Mrs. G. Fitzsimmons of Forest City."

Carrie is buried in Canaan Corners cemetery, next to Joseph.

Joseph E. Paynter 1875-1952

When I first started this blog, I wrote about my mothers parents.  Today I am going to document what I know about my father's father.  Joseph was the 5th child of Richard Paynter and Ellen Oliver Paynter.  Born on Dec 11, 1875, he was probably about 2 or 3 years old when his father died. His mother remarried when he was about 9.  I found him in the 1880 census in Oregon Township, Wayne County, PA with his widowed mother, his brothers and sisters. In the 1900 census, he can be found living in his married sister's household, designated as a servant.

For awhile he worked as a glass-cutter, making some beautiful cut-glass vases, dishes, and jewelry. When I was a child, I remember being allowed to wear a lovely cut-glass heart on a necklace chain.  One day the chain broke and the heart cracked when it hit the sidewalk on my way home from school.  I was devastated.  Later, he worked as a guard at Farview Hospital for the Criminal Insane, in Waymart, PA.  This was a model establishment, meant to test ways to rehabilitate inmates and teach them skills while making the complex self-sufficient.  From a booklet I read called "The Farview State Hospital Agricultural Complex,"  the guards were called overseers and their job was mostly to supervise the inmates work around the complex.  The inmates farmed and did all the repairs around the complex as a rehabilitation therapy and to offset the cost of keeping them incarcerated.
   
Joe was married three times. His first wife, Bertha Highouse gave him two sons and a daughter. The second son, Nelson, died at 8 months old. Bertha was pregnant again when her youngest child died, and she committed suicide.  After her death, the 2 older children, Enos and Violet, were sent to live with Bertha's parents, Enos Highhouse and Barbara Gredlein Highhouse.

Around 1911 Joe married his second wife, Carrie Grey. They had two sons, Russel and my Dad, Clayton.  This marriage was not meant to last either.  Carrie contracted breast cancer and died in 1922.  At this point, Joe was left with a teenage daughter and 2 little boys, 9 & 6 years old.  Carrie's aunt, Aldrude Shager was a widow 16 years older than Joe.  She came to take care of the children and Joe eventually married her in order to maintain proper appearances.  Aldrude stayed with Joe until she died in 1940.
    When Clayton and Daisy Orinick married in 1936, they moved in with Joe, since the house he lived in had been left to Clayton and his brother Russell in their grandfather's will (Jonas Seely). Daisy cared for Joe as he got older and began to forget who everyone was. Clayton got a job in New Jersey during WWII and came home on weekends. When the war was over, Russell came home and Daisy and the children moved to New Jersey. Russell couldn't care for Joe the way Daisy had, so he put his father in a nursing home. Joe died there in 1952.  This was 6 months before I was born, so I never got to meet him.

Obituary from The Wayne Independent, Honesdale, PA Feb 26, 1952:
Joseph E. Paynter, 75, formerly of Waymart, died Friday, Feb 22, 1952 at the Leidfrost Nursing Home, Beachlake, after a long illness. He was a native of Bethany. Surviving are three sons; Enos, Akron, O., Russell, Metuchean, N.J., and Clayton, Lyndhurst, N.J. Services were held at the Gerald A. Ball Funeral Home, Waymart, Sunday at 2p.m.  Rev. Russell A. Edwards, pastor, Waymart Baptist Church will officiate. Interment was in Canaan Corners Cemetery, Waymart.

Growing up without a father and outliving 3 wives must have made his life very sad.  I am hoping that either one of my 2 brothers or my sister, who did get to meet him when he was alive, will read this and add their memories of Grandpa Joe.